Dear Ms. Tub Buddie

Crafting Effective Direct Mail and Email Copy

Years ago when I was pregnant with my son I received a memorable piece of junk mail. Mind you, I wasn't just a little bit pregnant. I was as big as a bus. The envelope was addressed to Ms. Tub Buddie.

Since we manufactured Tub Buddies puppets at that time, I could sort of see how the mistake had been made and I could sort of forgive the sender. So I opened the offer and began to read the enclosed letter. It started off as expected, "Dear Tub Buddie." Throughout the letter I was addressed by my new (if not a bit odd) name. Then it was time to close the sale. In the classic direct mail format the author decided to get personal. "Tub, if you respond within the next 10 days you will receive…….."

I wish I hadn't thrown it away so fast. I wish I still had that letter. The irony of calling an enormously pregnant woman "Tub" is too great an example the thoughtless direct mail/technology run-away.

I remember thinking about the need to put some sort of magic checking system into the mail merge software packages. Sort of a little elf who would tidy everything up and make sure the information is accurate. Well, my son is going to be 17 in September and that elf still hasn't made his appearance. In a recent survey I conducted at my own mail box, over 1/3 of the direct marketing packets were miss-addressed.

Direct Marketing Copy Writing Rule #1 Make sure the names on your list are correct. Why? Because each name you put on each envelope is the most important piece of copy you will write. It is the recipient's own dear and valuable icon.

When I see the words "Claire Scholz" I process them intuitively. It's a right-brained thing. It usually makes me fell good, receptive, responsive etc. When I see the words "Claire Schultz" or "Carla Shotz" or "Ms. Tub Buddie" I process them on the left side of my brain. That is where the logical processing stuff happens. The results of that processing usually leads to a short trip to the trashcan. If I do open misprinted mail, I do so with a sense of distrust.

Rule #2 Sell the benefits, not the features. Don't tell me how great your products or services are. Tell me what they will do for me, my loved ones, my bottom line etc. George Duncan, one of the leading authorities on direct mail, teaches this very important mail order concept with his "Dunc's Ever-Gro Grass Seed".

One of the features of the seed is that the blades of grass are 1/16" wider than that produced by ordinary seed. Who cares? 1/16th of an inch isn't that big of a deal. It becomes a big deal when a cleaver marketer realized that broader grass blades reflect more light, thereby making the grass appear greener. So the copy might read something like, "gives your lawn a bright emerald green that will be the envy of the neighborhood."

Duncan goes further with the fact that his seed contains nitrogen. That's a nice feature especially when it becomes a benefit. Since nitrogen is a fertilizer the lawn owner won't need to spend time fertilizing his lawn. So the copy goes on to say, "Save time, save money, save work and hassle."

Dunc's Ever-Gro Grass Seed also has the attribute of being cold resistant. So the homeowner's lawn will stay green longer. If you put that thought into benefit-mode, the homeowner will "have a luscious lawn to enjoy longer than anyone else in the neighborhood-all the way to Halloween."

His last feature is extra long roots. Yes, this will make the lawn sturdier and stronger but he doesn't say that. He says, "the whole family can lie on it, play on it, and your lawn will look as good on Labor Day as it did on the Fourth of July."

The point is to sell the benefits, not the features. Appeal to the emotions of the reader. Explain your product or service not by what it is, rather by what it does for the end-user. Figure out how to make your customer say, "I have to have one of those things."

Rule #3 Once you get your potential customer hyped up about your goods, you have to get them to act. This can be done with one of the many tried and true "offer" techniques. Or you can come up with an offer of your own. Here is a short list of action offers from the American List Council (www.amlist.com).

1. Give a deadline for ordering.
2. Advise of a price increase.
3. Create a trial/introductory period.
4. Offer a nifty gift.
5. Extend a "no risk" trial.
6. Offer an upgrade.
7. Urge them to call for an "un-advertised special" or "secret offer".
8. Use "not available in stores" as a means to prompt action.

One word of caution, if you are planning a large direct mail program, it is best to use an advertising agency or a direct marketing consultant. As simple as it appears on the surface, mail order is actually a very complex science. It's also expensive. If the words "four color" even enter you mind while you are in the planning phase, then the words, "hire an expert" should come closely thereafter.

If you go the Agency route, be sure to look at samples of their previous work. Check with some of their direct mail clients to find out if their campaigns were effective. You can also get a wealth of advice from professional list brokerage houses. The above web address of the American List Council is a good place to start.